Friday, March 30, 2007

Thoughts about Holy Week

I have two prints on the wall of my office that are almost identical to each other - same artist, same name, same image - mostly. It's an etching by Rembrandt called Christ Presented to the People. The originals were created around 1655.

In the etching process it is possible to have a run of one image and then go back and change the plate which would give you a slightly different image for your second run. That second image would be called "state 2". The artist can change the plate as much as he/she wants creating as many "states" as they desire. Rembrandt created 8 states of Christ Presented to the People. I believe the image below is state #2.

In the foreground are the "people" that Christ is being presented to. Their backs are toward us. In middle ground you see Jesus, Pilate and some Roman soldiers. They are facing toward us and the crowd.

Somewhere around state 5 Rembrandt made a significant alteration to this image. Below is state 7.

He made it darker and more ominous. He also (most importantly) completely erased the foreground. This etching called Christ Presented to the People now has no crowd - no people. What's going on?

Rembrandt was a master of presenting profound spiritual truth through his work. I think he realized that the verdict of the "people" on that day 2,000 years ago is not the only verdict that counts. Jesus is being presented before each one of us with the question, "what will you do with this man?" We are the crowd. What do we say? If you were to time travel back and found yourself there on that day when Christ was presented - if you really were in the crowd - what would you yell? Knowing what you know now - that Christ's death and resurrection is our only hope. Do you yell, "crucify" knowing that He is innocent? Do you yell, "release him" knowing that if he does not die on the cross you are lost in your sins?

Or, do you just slump to the ground and cry?

The latter response seems more fitting, does it not? Christ gave himself; no one took his life from him.

For 2,000 years individuals have had to come to grips with the fact that the torturous death of the only innocent is our only hope. So, in a very real sense - Christ is still being presented before the people, and yours is the verdict that counts - not someone else's. He's looking at you. What will you do with this man? Will you shun him? Dismiss him? Will you have him?
This print by Rembrandt helps me through Holy Week. I have often struggled to know the correct "posture" or frame of mind as I remember the last week of my savior's earthly life. Joyful celebration seems out of place in light of the grim details of cross. But, mourning also seems out of place because through his death I have life. Through this print I am confronted by Jesus' innocence, the reality of the cross, the reality of my sin which put him there, and the very real need for me to come to a verdict about him. And, through it all I always end up with an overwhelming sense of gratitude.








Wednesday, March 28, 2007

Woody saves the day

Our church has a partnership with a homeless shelter nearby. This shelter has been a wonderful ministry for us to be a part of. Our participation there has been a stretching experience for many of our folks. It has been a great way for us to get out of our 4 walls and focus our attention toward needs within our community.

As a partnering church, we staff the shelter one week per quarter. We provide the food, money and volunteer hours needed for that week. The toughest part to fill is the graveyard shift volunteer hours. Someone has to be awake at all times. The residents are often up and about in the middle of the night. Someone has to be awake and know what it going on. That usually means the volunteers have to set up sleeping shifts in hopes of getting at least a couple of hours of sleep. I have done it several times. 3am till 6am is the hardest part of the night to stay awake. I am usually whipped the whole next day.

I was scheduled for last night (11:00pm till 8:00am)

Yesterday - late morning I started feeling cruddy. By early afternoon I had what I think was a migraine headache. (I never used to get headaches like these - but over the last couple of years I have had a handful of these headaches that have left me virtually incapacitated - pounding head, sensitivity to light, nausea - the whole bit). Well, I went home at about 3:00pm, pulled curtains and went to bed. Before the end of the workday I called my buddy Woody and asked if he would take my shift at the homeless shelter. Essentially I was asking him on little notice to forgo a night with his wife and any sleep he was planning on getting. He willingly agreed.

I slept great. I feel much better today.

I called Woody at work this morning. He is functioning at about half-speed. He said he didn't sleep a wink last night. Props to you, Woody. You're a pal.

I love the Body of Christ.

Monday, March 26, 2007

Monday musings - March 26

Being a pastor means Sunday is like "game day" for me. Much of the week is spent getting ready for the weekend. Much of Monday is spent replaying the mental highlight reel of events and conversations. Here are my musings about this past weekend.

Sermon - I am preaching through Luke. Yesterday I started chapter 9. It was a shortened message because we had so many things going on in our meeting time - which I will talk about in a minute. I only discussed verses 1 through 6 in my sermon. Jesus sent the 12 out with the message of the kingdom and the authority to heal diseases and cast out demons. It was essentially a short-term mission trip. The disciples were not to take long-term provisions; they were to live on the generosity of others; they were to return soon and report to Christ the details of their mission. Reading that passage, I am confronted by the intentionality of Jesus' program. His plan for impacting the world with His message was to invest his life in a relatively small number of people - to train those people for ministry and then send them out with a mandate to continue with the mission. It is clear from Luke 9:1-6 that Jesus' plan was not to teach them in order to become knowledgeable, but to train them in order to become leaders. This was a training mission. By the end of his ministry Jesus will command his disciples to go and do what they have been trained to do - what they have witnessed Jesus doing - making disciples.

Jesus gave us a model for worldwide evangelization - multiplication through spiritual reproduction. Disciples are to be in the business of making disciples makers. Anyone who has spent any time in Campus Crusade (or any similar para-church ministry) has probably been a part of this model. It is interesting when you look back over the last 100 years of church history - the rise of evangelical para-church ministries (like Crusade) happened because the church was (by and large) not doing its job. The church had become ingrown and self-obsessed, not actively engaging in the mission Jesus gave us to fulfill. And now, decades after the rise para-church ministries, much of "the church" has yet to learn its lesson. We seem content to equate knowledge and obedience, teaching and training, discipleship and Bible study. All too often, the way of "the church" does not seem to fit Jesus' model, nor does it produce the effect Jesus was after.

Pastor of Student Ministries. On a much lighter note - this past weekend was the "candidating weekend" for our new Pastor of Student Ministries. His name is John Bueger; he will be graduating from Dallas Seminary this spring. He will start with us this summer. I am super excited about this guy. I think he going to do great. I wish he could start next week. The weekend was filled with meetings and social events designed to give people the opportunity to get to know John and his wife. I conducted a mock interview on Sunday morning to let people hear his philosophy of ministry (which is why I had a shortened sermon).

All and all it was a good weekend - busy, but in a good kind of way.

Friday, March 23, 2007

What does faithfulness look like today?

It would seem like such a simple question. What does it mean to be faithful today? This week? This year? It is a deceptively difficult question to answer. For all Christ followers, faithfulness has to be oriented to a person - to Jesus. Our allegience is not pledged to a creed or a tradition or an ecclesiastical structure. We are to be faithful to Him. I would hope that at least most of Christ's followers could at least agree on that. But, the age old confussion that we all grapple with is, what does that faithfulness look like in practical terms on a daily, monthly, yearly, stage of life basis? What does it look like to be faithful to Him? What am I supposed to do... today? By what standard is faithfulness judged? Some would argue that it is a behavioral standard that cries out for Christian faithfulness (a list of do's and don'ts). There is actually a lot to be said for that. Our integrity, honesty and purity should make us stand out (in a positive way). Like it or not, there is a standard of behavior. The landscape is littered with Christian leaders who disregarded the importance of things like fidelity and truth telling. It is clear that an aspect of faithfulness has to do with a predetermined standard of personal holiness.

But is that all? For so many (including myself all too often), the "faithful" Christian life is seen like a job description. There is the list of things we are supposed to so and the list of things we are not supposed to do - get most of them right and you are doing pretty good. It's a pretty safe approach.

But, what if "faithful" is not so static? What if behavioral standards are not the final definition of faithfulness? Christ has called us to a mission - to share good news far and near - to make disciples everywhere - to do what He did. What if faithfulness has more to do with the fulfillment of mission than anything else? It seems awful easy in the Christian community to take on behavioral standards but not be involved in the mission of the gospel or the disciple-making process at all. You can still be called faithful if you jump through the other hoops. Will God call us faithful? "Well, no God, I didn't actually take part in the Great Commission but I was very busy in church and did all the other things the Christian community said was important". I am not sure He will be impressed.

In the parable of the talents, reward is directly tied to risk. A general command of growth is given, talents are then dispensed. It is up to each person to figure out the best way to bring about the greatest degree of growth. There is a tremendous amount of risk and initiative that is necessary. Each one is responsible for making it happen. They have to make their own opportunities. The one who plays it safe is condemned.

How do we fit into that? What does it mean to "play it safe"? As one who is firmly within the Christian sub-culture, I know exactly what it means to play it safe. Being an acceptable Christian within the Christian sub-culture is not hard to do. Surrounding myself with Christian friends and doing church things is not difficult - not difficult at all. Perhaps what we call faithfulness, Christ would call "playing it safe". I wonder if any of us will be surprised to receive rebuke rather than reward?

To be continued...

Wednesday, March 21, 2007

What would Wyatt think?

This past weekend and all through this week Kelly and I have the opportunity to host several of our friends as they visit over Spring Break or "pass through" on their Spring Break journey to somewhere else. We have a bustling house right now - and we love it.

For the last few days my college buddy Ross and his family have been with us. Here is a sample of a recent conversation.

Ross: "Dude, let's go to Dodge City".
Me: "What? Dodge City? Why?"
Ross: "Because, it's Dodge City, bro - Wyatt Earp - let's go."
Me: "Isn't Dodge City far away?"
Ross: "The map shows about 150 miles"
Me: "150 miles!? That will take all day to get there and back"
Ross: "I know. It will be a guy trip. Come on bro."

So, we went west, out to where Wyatt Earp and Doc Holiday did their thing. What we found was... I am not quite sure how to describe it.

I know virtually nothing about Wyatt Earp and even less about Dodge City. (I did see the Kevin Costner movie Wyatt Earp, but I thought it was too boring to remember). Dodge City today is like a normal western Kansas town - lots of cows, lots of wheat. But Dodge City is also trying to cash in on the old west cowboy mystique and thereby lure unsuspecting people like my buddy and me and then separate us from our money.

There are essentially two historic Front Streets in town. (Evidently, "Front Street" was the main street when Wyatt was around). One "Front Street" is like a regular shopping center but with that old west look (wood facades, hitching posts, wooden sidewalks, etc). But the businesses are modern - Wyatt Earp Pizza Hut, Cuttin' Corral Hair and Nail Salon - stuff like that. About a block or so down - between the Applebee's and the Sonic is the more "authentic" Front Street. But this Front Street is gated. You have to pay $7 to get in. But once inside the people are all dressed like it was 1887. Unfortunately this is the off season, so we only saw 2 "characters" in the whole place. Very disappointing. But, fortunately we were able to see some animatronic Indians and some souvenirs which could be purchased (like cowboy Christmas ornaments and "Boot Hill" coffee mugs with your name on them). Ross couldn't resist the coffee mug - he bought one for me as a gift. Thanks, Ross.
I forgot my camera so I had to buy a disposable one at the Dodge City Wal-Mart when we first got into town. But, once I got to the "Front Streets" I found out that there was very little to take pictures of. So, I have almost an entire roll to use up before I can post any more pictures. You're just going to have to wait.

Upon leaving Dodge City to head for home I had two regrets from the trip. I didn't get a picture of me with the bronze statue of Wyatt. And, I never exclaimed the need to "get out of Dodge." What a missed opportunity.

Thursday, March 15, 2007

Rock and Roll Hall of Fame

On the heels of my rambling post yesterday about the gatekeepers of "good art", I heard an interesting interview today about the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. The new inductees were just announced and evidently there is some debate as to the worthiness of those inductees. Patti Smith (punk rocker who never sold many albums), Grandmaster Flash and the Furious Five(early hip hop) and Van Halen (cheesy 80's band that had ton's of popular success) are all being inducted. I don't have an opinion one way or the other about any of those artists (except maybe Van Halen - give me a break). But, it is interesting to listen to the debate about what is Hall of Fame worthy.

Is public success necessary? It is a popular art form. Does the artist need to be "popular"? What if the artist is popular but their music stinks? Is there a Rock and Roll standard - a definition of some sort of what "good" rock and roll is? Should rap be included? Sounds a lot like the questions I was grappling with yesterday.

Click here to listen to an interview with Patti Smith.
http://www.npr.org/templates/story/story.php?storyId=8933119

Wednesday, March 14, 2007

So, who gets to decide what is or isn't good art?

A friend recently gave me a copy of the book cataloging all the art in the National Gallery in Washington, DC. He had the book sitting around collecting dust so he gave it to me thinking I might appreciate it. Thumbing through that book raised a very complex question that I have been grappling with for years; "Who decides what great art is?"

This discussion is probably above my pay grade. Smarter people than I have been debating this issue for centuries and it will certainly not be solved here on my little blog. But, since this is my blog and I can talk about whatever I want, I choose to talk about this issue which has long befuddled me. (I entered art school 17 years ago - I have been pondering this issue at least that long).

It seems to me that there are a finite number of answers to the question, "who gets to determine what is or isn't art?" It's either: 1) the public at large through some type of general consensus, 2) a subset of the public who has been given the authority to declare such things whether the public likes it or not, 3) the artist gets to declare, or 4) somehow the art itself irrefutably adheres to the highest of artistic standards placing it beyond subjective opinion. Those are our only options - it seems to me.

Well, obviously - best case scenario, all 4 of those things will be in play. In really great art - the trans-generational art of the masters, you see all 4. The paintings of Monet are a good example of this. Among the impressionists of his day, Monet was the leader. He had a
profound impact on artists such as Renoir, Degas and Cezanne who in turn impacted many others. Today, the artistic community unequivocally recognizes Monet's mastery and his importance in the story of art. But, it is not just the artistic elite who praise his work. In our day the public at large gobbles up Monet images at shopping mall poster shops and the calendar section of book stores. People with very little understanding (or concern) for impressionism as a movement, nevertheless find something to relate to in Monet's work. That's significant.

There seems to be something irrefutable about
many of Monet's paintings. Even outside of an understanding of impressionism, his paintings speak for themselves. It is almost as if there is some sort of slippery and hard to quantify "golden mean" of artistic excellence that his work adheres to. Issues like color, balance, symmetry, atmosphere, light, form, technical rendering, etc - are all treated so adeptly by Monet within the style in which he worked.

There is also the issue that Monet paintings are great because Monet painted them. He seems to have earned that right. If a long lost painting of Monet's was discovered it would be worth millions simply because of who painted it. He is such a heavy hitter he can determine his own strike zone - set his own rules.

So, in the case of Monet - the artistic community, the public, the art itself and the credibility of the artist all point to the excellence of his work. He is an easy example. The difficulty comes when you consider art that does not have all four sources. What do we do with artwork by unproven artists? What about work from artists that the public enjoys but are shunned by the artistic community (ie. Thomas Kincade)? What about all those artists whose wor
k is praised by the artistic community but is completely unintelligible to the public. The artistic elite is content to call everyone else "stupid" for not understanding great art or great artists - but is that ok? It is possible for the artistic community to label someone as an artist and then praise whatever that artist does. Is that a bit out of whack? (The painting on your right is by an artist named Jo Baer. It can be found at the San Francisco Museum of Modern Art)

I will no doubt explore this issue in future posts. The main issue is this, if most art does not have all four sources arguing for its excellence, then which source is most important? Who is the real gatekeeper? Is it the public? It is the artistic community? Is it the artist? Or, is there a "golden mean" of excellence in every art form to which artists must aspire?

This issue becomes much more personal when we start talking about popular art forms such as movies and popular music - particularly in the Christian arena. Whose art is praise worthy? Who gets to decide? What's the criteria?

Tuesday, March 13, 2007

Thoughts about coffee grounds - part 3

Ok - this will be my last post concerning the coffee grounds illustration. I most likely have already stretched this analogy to the breaking point. I will try to be brief.

It is clear from Scripture that Christ's followers are to impact the world around them. We are salt and light. In my own "you are the coffee of the earth" kind of way, I am drawing a similar analogy with coffee. Coffee has limited usefulness if it can't properly influence the hot water it comes into contact with. But, coffee has to be broken and burned before it can be used. It seems to me that as followers of Jesus Christ, we must resist the temptation to hide all of our failings and pretend to be someone we are not. We live in the midst of a broken and burned world filled with broken and burned people and our message is that of redemption. The pain and the junk that we all go through, the mistakes that we have made, the people that we have hurt – they are, in the hands of our loving Heavenly Father, our greatest messages of salvation. That God could love me, be patient with me, bestow His grace on me, bless me – even me! That is the greatest message my life can ever preach.

God has not spared any of us from pain, loss, or the consequences of our own stupid decisions. He has let us make a mess out of things. Hasn't He? A very well known passage (Romans 8:28) says, “And we know that God causes all things to work together for good to those who love God, to those who are called according to His purpose.” Perhaps, along with other things, God is using our heartache to season us for greater influence.

As a pastor I have the privilege of hearing a lot of people's stories. There is a shocking consistency in the stories I hear about the journey to become more like Christ. The things which mold us, build us and change our lives the most are not the times of ease, pleasure, or blessing but rather the times of sin, suffering, and struggle. The greatest aspect of our personal story is not our perfection, but our pain. The fact that God can redeem the pain, use the mistakes, and bring beauty out of ashes – that's the glory of the gospel - that’s the message people need to hear. God has given each of us a powerful story to tell, but we must have the courage, the honesty and the vulnerability to tell it.

Saturday, March 10, 2007

This good day

It's Saturday. I woke up this morning and realized I had nothing to do today. Nothing. No meetings, no projects, no ball games, no company coming over (which would require franic house cleaning). Nothing. Then the sun came out and the air warmed up. What a nice day. What an unexpected blessing this day has become. The windows are open; I can hear birds outside; I can feel the cool breeze. Downstairs, I can hear my daughters talking nicely to each other as they together straighten up their art supplies. Eerie.

This is that day we all long for when life takes over - when crisis hits - when our schedules leave us gasping for air. This type of day never seems to come, and then all of a sudden, there it is. Surprise.

The sad thing is this - it is already mid-aftenoon and I spent much of the morning fretting over things that were out of my control. I was also anxious that I wasn't getting anything done. I almost missed the blessings of this day. It almost came and went. I could have gone the entire day and not thanked God for his incredible love and grace toward me - all because I was too self-centered and preoccupied to notice it. And then, I would have gone on wondering when I would be able to have a stress free day to enjoy my family.

But I did notice it. It's not too late. I realize that God is equally praise worthy in times of struggle and pain and trial. However, as I read Scripture it seems that God also delights in giving good gifts, and today is one of those gifts. I think He wants me to be glad today. So, today I choose to. I know that everyone in my community is experiencing the blessing of this day (whether they are followers of Christ or not). I hope they too are recognizing God's goodness in it all and giving him praise. Sadly, I know that most aren't. But I will.

There is a song by Fernando Ortega in which he sings: "This good day, it is a gift from you. The world is turning in its place because you made it to. I lift my voice to sing a song of praise on this good day." Thank you Father for this good day.

Friday, March 9, 2007

May I suggest the Monkey Blend?


I just came in from roasting what promisses to be a fine batch of coffee beans - Sweet Marias' Espresso Monkey Blend - one of my favorites. But, now I smell like smoke because I roast in the garage without any ventilation. When it is chilly outside I roast with the garage door closed so the cold air won't affect the roast times. But, when someone opens the door, smoke billows out. I am sure I get strange looks. What's that's pastor doing in his garage anyway?

Why do I roast my own coffee? Because fresh roasted coffee is really, really good. And, I can feed my caffeine habit for about $5 per pound - about half the price of Starbucks. If anyone is interested in learning more about roasting their own coffee - Sweet Marias is the place to start. I have a link on this blog. Sweet Maria's will teach you everything you needed to know, and more. But, if you try to roast your own, don't even think about doing it inside your home - you will set off every fire alarm and your house will not smell like fresh roasted coffee, it will smell like burnt popcorn - for days. Trust me on this.

Thoughts about coffee grounds - part 2


Ok - back to the coffee grounds. It's quite obviouse that the coffee grounds illustration is very similar to the illustration Jesus used when He called His followers “salt of the earth”. He went on to say that if the salt becomes tasteless, it has lost its usefulness. The point is clear. Salt is useful because of its beneficial influence on other things. And for 2,000 years the church has tried to determine what it means to be salt to its generation.

But what does it mean to become tasteless? I think we often end up communicating that only people who fit into an external mode of religious perfection are truly salty. It’s only the ones that have this Christian life all figured out, who don’t struggle much with sin and doubt and pain – those are the only ones who can truly represent Christ. That way of thinking causes a whole lot of us to just fake it – to look the part - to fit in to this Christian sub-culture that many of us are a part of. But, certainly that is not what Jesus meant by being “salty” is it? If so, the Pharisees of his day would have been the model for Jesus to point to. They were the religious elite and the model of religious perfection. They did everything right.

The New Testament church is filled with all kinds of people – selfish, bitter, angry, lustful, proud, hurt and wounded people. But, these are also people who have recognized their need for a savior and have placed their trust in Jesus Christ (or are on a journey toward doing so). They are people who have been burned and broken – who are being made whole but are not whole yet. The story of redemption is a painful one in all of our lives. It seems to me that coffee is not good in spite of the heat from the roaster or the pressure from the grinding wheel. It only has influence because of those things. Likewise, our brokenness (not just our brokeness before Christ, but our continued brokeness now) is a vital part of our redemption story. It has to be.

Thursday, March 8, 2007

Pictoral update on the Holmes clan

Since this is a brand new blog - and since many of my friends who might actually be interested in reading this blog haven't actually seen me or my family in a while (since we live in Kansas and all) - I thought it might be nice to post some recent pictures.







Here is Kelly and Abby and Emma in Colorado last October. I love this picture.













Here is Gracie in our backyard. I love this picture too.













Here's me and my best friend.











Wednesday, March 7, 2007

Thoughts about coffee grounds - part 1


I love coffee. I really, really do. Like a lot of people, my love for good coffee started when Starbucks showed up in my neighborhood. I was quickly hooked. My coffee interest has now, however, turned into more than a simple craving. On my kitchen counter is a drip coffee maker, a French press coffee maker, an espresso machine and a coffee grinder. In my garage I do my own coffee roasting with 6 (very beat up) hot-air popcorn poppers. I’ve pretty much gone over the edge.

As I roast coffee from all over the world, I’ve learned a lot about coffee beans and how good coffee is made. On its journey from the coffee plantation to my coffee cup, there are many variables that effect the flavor: the country of origin, the soil properties of the coffee plantation, the type of bean, the method and time of harvest, the method of drying, the time and temperature and “roast curve” to a particular method of roasting, the “rest time” after roasting (but before grinding), the coarseness of the grind, the method of brewing, the proportions of coffee to water and the amount of time the coffee is in contact with the water. Just to name a few.

Seems a bit excessive, don’t you think? Especially for a product that ends up being thrown in the trash – as my coffee grounds are.

The interesting thing about coffee is that its only value is in its ability to influence the water that is around it. And, when done right, that hot water is turned into rich, flavorful, aromatic, caffeinated wonderfulness. All the effort was worth it. But, if for some reason the coffee is not able to properly transform the water (perhaps because it is left in the bag and never used, or because it was not properly roasted or ground – whatever) then what good is it? Rarely does someone eat a coffee bean straight. If it doesn’t bring about the desired change in water, then coffee has very little use at all.

Saturday, March 3, 2007

An odd juxtaposition of incongruent elements

As pretentious and ridiculous as that title is - it is the reason I am starting this blog.

Spring Break, 1992 - Monterrey, Mexico. I was there with Campus Crusade for Christ and another Christian ministry called Athletes in Action. The athletes would hold exhibition style competitions against the University of Monterey's basketball team and then between periods one of the athletes would share with the crowd about how he came to know and trust Jesus Christ. The rest of us just milled around the crowd and tried to start discussions with those who might be interesed in spiritual things. Hard to do when you don't speak Spanish. The students there were much more gracious than American students would have been with people who didn't know the language. They were very patient and eager to practice their English. It was a fun week, and I (like many in my CCC group) was just glad to get out of America and do something sort of exotic for our Spiring Break.

On one of the days there (the "tour-the-city-like-tourists" day) I, along with several of my friends and Crusade acquaintances were wandering the streets of Monterey, trying not to get lost. We came upon a very old, very tall, very ornate cathedral - which in and of itself is not that noteworthy; there are a lot of these in Monterey. On this one, however, up near the top, someone had mounted a big cross made out of bright blue neon lights.

What were they thinking? Were they trying to modernize - bring their church up to date? Were they attempting to reach a new culture with an old religion? Were they just trying to draw attention to themselves among a people who had no doubt already come to ignore that old building?

A fellow art major who was also a follower of Jesus Christ was standing next to me and we both saw the cathedral at the same time. "Well, there's an odd juxtaposition of incongruent elements", she said. I coudn't believe it. How can someone come up with a sentence like that off the top of her head? It was amazing. What perfect timing. That momement - that sentence was the most memborable part of the week. And now, 15 years later - it still rings in my ears, but for different reasons than it did before.

I have long felt like a bit of a square peg - like I don't quite fit in wherever I am. In art school as a follower of Christ, I definitely didn't fit in. In many ways I think that Christian artists live in the worst of both worlds. Evangelical Christians are too intolerant and closed-minded for the artistic community. The artistic community is seen as too weird for large sections of the Christian community. (I realize that there are pockets within the Evangelical Christian community where the arts are flourishing quite nicely, but that is a pretty late development. And, even then the musical arts are far outpacing the visual and performing arts.)

Even now, as an Evangelical Chirstian I find within myself an incongruous relationship with the Christian sub-culture in our country - a sub-culture that I am a part of. And I am a pastor for crying out loud. I am a leader within that sub-culture.

I wonder if people look at me and scratch their head. I am a city boy pastoring in a small town in Kansas. I love the arts; I roast my own coffee beans; I love good espresso; I build much of our own furniture; I listen to world music, and I love Jesus Christ. I am committed to God's Word and the old, old story of Jesus and his love - a story everyone needs to hear.

In some respects, I feel like the old cathedral with the neon cross - a mixture of odd cultures. So, here is my Holmes blend. This blog will be more for my benefit than anyone else's - a way to sort out my thoughts and explore the things I am interested in. If you have just taken the time to read this post, thanks. If you too, feel like an odd duck - be comforted. There is room for people like us.